pumpkins

i have four brothers.

i watched them put a dead raccoon in a girl from schools mailbox. once-they held a knife to my throat and wrote "dork" on my forehead. they used to lock me out when we got home from school and eat sandwiches and dance in front of the windows while i sat outside. i watched my oldest brother make my youngest brother drink urine. the cleaning lady found one of them hiding under a pile of clothes when he was supposed to be at school.

the first time i ever smoked pot i was thirteen. a girl with blue hair fall into the creek where my brothers used to camp. the next morning i woke to three of their friends bleeding faces...they had been in an accident and walked all night. i had to go back to the house to get bandages and my mom asked me if i wanted to go to church.